Fossett's searchers working credible leads

Steve Fossett has flown around the world in a balloon, flown around the world in a plane without refueling, and a whole bunch of other crazy shit. He was in a small plane looking for a place to break the land speed record when he disappeared. That's as if Dale Earnhardt had died driving to the grocery store or if Hugh Hefner, after a lifetime of fucking hot chicks, died of a fast moving strain of AIDS after (ahem) starfucking Rosie O'Donnell. I mean, someone like Fossett should die in a blaze of glory, not looking for a place to achieve it. Oregon has deployed some planes to help in the search. Previous efforts to find Fossett has found several other missing aircraft. These aircraft and their pilots, I'm sure, were not searched for as intensively as the millionaire Fossett's craft has been.

OJ arrested on theft charges

OJ has stated that "the truth will come out." This may give publishers another chance not to published an OJ penned book. "If I Did It...2" could be the first unpublished sequel to an unpublished book.

Classic Inchworm for sale at Hammacher Schlemmer
$70 for an item I had as a child? I had one of these and I know it didn't cost $70 even in 1970s currency. 1970s currency which of course had Gabe Kaplan on the dollar bill and Peter Frampton on the $5. Strange times indeed.

Check out this douchie-douche. Some jokes are fucking hilarious... this being one of them. The guy's going to be the funniest guy at the soup kitchen, I guarantee it. Apparently this broadcast live.

Click here for the video: WEATHERMAN NIPPLE VIDEO

I've done a little research on the whole Wal-Mart/Big Box store phenomenon and how it has caused the downfall of the small business in communities. Wal-Mart, for so many reasons, sucks. However, most communities don't have Joe the grocer, Sam the butcher, and Eddie the produce guy. I don't think there are any non-box stores in our neighborhoods. I mean, I like Trader Joe's but even it's getting a bit corporate and playing to the hippie chic crowd that feels better about themselves simply because they spent an extra $2 a pound on "organic" produce. I live about a mile from a Wal-Mart and shop there only because the only local "small" businesses it's hurting are Fred Meyer and Safeway. I'm sure that those two stores alone put some independent business people out of business, and I'm sure no one made a documentary about that.

South Park wins Emmy for "World of Warcraft" episode.

Fucking sweet. I downloaded and watched this episode while in PDX after missing a flight. Good stuff.

goochout.

So, Britney Spears bombs at the Video Music Awards? Everyone except the VMA producers saw that coming, didn't they? Nope... the producers knew what was going to happen. They knew she wasn't prepared. They probably paid her bar tab when she partied the night before the show. Everyone knows Spears is a psycho out-of-shape has been. Her antics have sold more celebrity sleaze magazines than any phenomenon as of late (I've even bought a few) and MTV seemed to think her performance was headliner worthy? No other talent was more qualified to open the VMAs?

MTV knew what they were doing. They did the same thing that US Weekly, OK, Star, In Touch, and others (the ones listed are the only ones currently on my coffee table) are doing: exploiting the mentally ill to make money.

Hey Britney, with that body and that outfit I could probably get you a day shift at Montego's.

Probably.


Making her way up to the main stage... indeed.

goochout.

I'm out of my fucking mind. I almost downloaded the nude picture of Vanessa Hudgens that has been propagating around the internet, but I didn't care enough to do so. Now that I've decided to comment on it, it's too late. Who the fuck is she? She's in High School Musical and dating Zac Efron, another HSM cast member who is on the cover of every magazine right now. She's a Disney Channel alum. She's apologizing for taking the private nude pictures.

Unless you're dating me, NEVER take nude pictures of yourself. Especially in the digital age.Someone might but I'll sure as shit use those pictures for evil. Even if you put them in a safe place. Even I've got a DVD floating around somewhere. True Story. The Superficial had the nude picture up, but took it down due to lawyer requests according to the site. I'd put it up, since I haven't had any lawyer issues since the Sara Rue incident.

But if you're on Disney, shouldn't you take extra care in not having nude pictures turn up. I guess this is like Annette Funicello winding up spread eagle in a Polaroid. I watched the old Mickey Mouse Club shows when I was a kid. I hated Annette because she was such a god damned goody two-shoes. I bet she was an absolute gang-banging three-input slut. Yeah, that's it... where's the 8MM footage of that?

Someone email the original Vanessa Hucaresgens nude to me.

Vanessa Hudgens in nude scandal

goochout

goochpourri...

I had my palm read while at the coast this week. I thought it was all bullshit and I even thought that going into the room with the gypsy lady and my girlfriend's $20 (I'm not paying for this shit). Once the door shut and me and the scammer were across the table from each other with my palms out for her to read (you masturbate with... your... right... hand... heh) I started to sweat profusely at the thought that maybe this broad actually has a window into my soul. She gave me the basic info like "you've been unappreciated and put down your entire life" and told me shit that I wanted to hear "you will come into a large sum of money... your income will double..."

So I started making collection calls this week on some past due accounts. Hopefully she's spooky accurate.

I'm the type of person who writes about the type of person that begins every other sentence with "I'm the type of person." If you're that type of person... stop it. It's annoying.

Halle Berry is pregnant. The older the Berry, the sweeter the juice. Heh. She's 41 and I'm 33, yet despite our age we've decided to keep the child. What? Not mine? Fuck it. One of my ex-girlfriends from way back has a child with a weight problem and a therapist. I keep looking at him like... naw... no, impossib... naw... unh uh...

I'm sure I don't have any kids out there.



The Virgin Galactic Spaceport conceptual illustration has been released. I think more buildings should look like vaginas. What's more inviting than a giant vulva? Vagina... Virgin... I get it. I think the entryways to buildings and homes should look like this. My ex girlfriend's vagina actually looked like a revolving door (or at least acted like one)... I'll email any architect a digital picture if it will help in the design of my building entry concept. I could probably email a picture of my ex girlfriend's vagina to a random email address and the recipient would reply with a message stating "wait... I know her."

Fuck.

Gotta go to work.

GoochOut.