I'm driving a Nissan Altima as a rental while the Escape gets its overdue service done. It's nice... my friend YMike drives one.

Toshiba Quits HD-DVD War

This, my friends, is bullshit. I hope I saved my motherfucking receipt from Costco for the HD-DVD player I purchased about a week ago.

I was on my way to resolve a printing issue for a customer when, in the unfamiliar Altima, I couldn't figure out how to change the radio band to AM. I almost canceled the job since I felt so electronically incompetent that I couldn't figure out how to listen to Dr. Laura that I could not possibly be qualified to install an HP printer.

Do you know how to install an HP printer? If you answered no and have no grasp of the english language, than you could work for HP.

I'm within the throes of a monumental depression. I slept for 12 hours last night. I've never done that without the help of weed. I feel like having a big plate of prime rib, a big glass of Jack Daniels/Diet Coke, and a .38 slug for dessert. I've been cranking the ABBA on my iPod for a couple of hours and am still unable to snap out of it. Maybe I'll visit Dr. Daniels tonight. I'm in a rental, so I pretty much have the okay for drinking and driving (I paid the extra insurance). If I was going to wrap a car around a telephone pole at 3am, it should be nicer than an Altima. Maybe I'll upgrade.

What would Dr. Laura do?

goochout

An ex-girlfriend had her car set on fire on Friday morning. Crazy shit... glad no one was hurt.

Arson Suspected in Car and House Fire

Unless the car was a Corvair or a Pinto that just got rear ended... it's pretty much guaranteed that it was arson. I think the words "suspected" and "allegedly" are used too much in the news and in life. Examples: OJ allegedly killed his wife and Ron Goldman. I suspect that the girl who tazed me does not want to go on a second date. I suspect that I'll choose jerking off over taking a shower (due to time constraints, of course) before I go to work. I was allegedly sober when I slammed the side of my car into my car port (I actually was sober... I was allegedly smart when I did it... disputable).

goochout

I haven't done really anything exciting to write about. It's depressing. I will try to do something completely insane/morally void/spectacular/illegal in the coming days. If I was going to write about what I've done lately, it would sound something like this:

...I microwaved a bowl of frozen edamame and ate it while reading the paper. I put in a new door bell button and door knob in the hallway closet. I plan on jogging in a bit, once the edamame digests.

I did drink a Bud Light-Chelada beer last night. It tastes like the red beers you get made for you at the bar. It's Bud or Bud Light and Clamato (clam/tomato juice). Fucking delicious. I shit you not. They just need to make an energy drink/vodka beverage that doesn't taste like ass.


goochout.

Tech Report: Woman sues Best Buy for lying about, losing her laptop.

Her Blog

I guess she believes her laptop is worth some 54 million dollars, in addition to its $1100 retail value. I'd have the same claim, with the value of my laptop at about $290. The contents, however, consisting of about $200,000,000 of porn and illegitimately obtained music, would be the basis for my claim. I'd sue Best Buy, Metallica would sue me. It's the circle of life. If life is defined by litigation and piracy, which I truly believe it is.

goochout.

I think it's awesome that I can forecast market trends... predict the future of technology, then spend my money based on my uncanny ability to analyze the future of, say, video formats:

http://scitech.blogs.cnn.com/

I'm gonna buy the cheap videos off Amazon. Fuck it... I'm going down with this format the way my Father did with Betamax before me. Sort of a Darth Vader/Luke Skywalker inevitability.

Where the hell did I put my MiniDisc player?

I'm Gooch, bitch.

(wow... that shit never gets old, eh?)

Apparently, this website is banned in China. This is according to the "Website Test behind the Great Firewall of China."

http://www.websitepulse.com/help/testtools.china-test.html

Maybe it was my Kim Kardashian stunt, or my seemingly enless ramblings about Prime Rib, xanax, and strippers. Maybe this site is so bad that it was an act of graciousness from the Chinese Government to its citizens.

Working at Montego's tonight. I now work six days a week, one night a week, and some evenings doing book keeping.

I actually blew out my iTunes. Apparently, once you get above 100GB it gets a little hairy. Hairy, as in shit blows up.

I did buy an HD DVD player. I heard that HD DVD is the format losing the format war, but it does look fanfuckingtastic. It really does make regular DVDs look almost high def.

back to the grill.

goochout.

Thanks to everyone that came out to Montego's last night. It was a lot of fun. It was so fun, that if you wanted to hear the same Motley Crue song three times... I'd do it. That kind of fun. Whose tongue is that in my ear? kind of fun. Womens' underwear in the DJ tip jar kind of fun. I'm currently sweating vodka from my pores kind of fun.

I have to work today. I'm now working too much. It's official. I may crack.

JG