Some girl that hung out with a group of us at the beach deducted, after the time spent with me, that I was a "pompous ass."
Pompous: Characterized by excessive self-esteem or exaggerated dignity.
Perhaps she doesn't realize that I have an ENTIRE WEBSITE dedicated to essentially making fun of myself. Funny... it's not the first time I've been called this.
I gorged myself with salad rolls tonight. I cleaned the kitchen and made my bed. It took me five full minutes to find my fitted sheet (it was stuffed at the head of the bed; must not have slept well last night). I was at a friend's house last night and she pointed out how "well" her 11-year-old had made his somewhat disheveled bed. I didn't notice a problem; it probably looked a little tidier than mine at the moment. That's ultimately why men get married: To have the same person make your bed for the rest of our lives. Or, make our beds and reject us for sex for the rest of our lives.
Until death do you part, indeed.
Yesterday my ex-girlfriend and I resumed our friendship again after a sixth month hiatus. Yesterday the microwave she gave me three years ago quit working. It's like I had to sacrifice something to the appliance gods in exchange for a reunion.
I'm supposed to check out this new club that a former classmate is managing. Unfortunately, Mr. Saturday Night (that' s me) feels like finishing last night's bottle of merlot (I'll pour some out onto the curb as a tribute to my dead microwave) and falling asleep to the sweet sounds of a bootleg South Park DVD.
goochout
2 comments:
This comment has been deleted.
Psych.
Why doesn't anyone say that anymore, I guess because it was stupid the second time.
Somehow you do have an ability to come off as a pompous ass, but those guys always get mad pussy. I guess you are unique.
Post a Comment