First full day in Reno. The Eldorado Italian Festival is currently happening on the streets below my hotel window. I've been there all morning watching every single Italian stereotype played out over four city blocks. An organ-grinder monkey? It's down there. I've got to get me one of those. If I can train a monkey to mix a decent bloody mary, I can stop asking for a midget this Christmas.
I'm staying at the Circus Circus in Reno. They have a shitty buffet, but a decent wedding chapel. If 24-hour wedding chapels are so popular in Nevada, maybe I should offer a 24-hour annulment service. I'm ordained to perform weddings... what website do I need to go to be ordained to unperform them? Fuck... there's a niche market waiting to be tapped.
I'm up about $60 at blackjack so far. The chips I hold in my hand tonight represent tomorrow's awful hangover. There's some pretty cool clubs popping up in Reno - not like it was 10 years ago. I think I'll end up at Shooters tonight. It's a cool little bar and Dave Attel even shot his "Insomniac" show there a few years ago. Also a plus is that the bartenders are hot and usually more drunk than me at any given moment.
I went out on a date Wednesday night. I found a girl completely opposite of every girl I've dated in recent memory and asked her out. I was actually hoping she'd cancel on me as I started to realize (as I'm vacuuming out my car) how much work dating is. She was cool and after dinner I brought her out to hang out with my friends. A group of us were sitting at a booth and my date was holding her own like a champ. Things were smooth until the topic of getting my friend's hot tub repaired came up. Marty, the hot tub owner, hinted that the reason for his non-functioning hot tub was that "one of Gooch's condoms" probably got stuck in the filter. Marty realized what he'd said in front of my date, his girlfriend's eyes got wide as she punched his leg under the table, and I wasn't able to look at my date for the next five minutes. I almost leaned over and said "he's only kidding, I didn't use a condom that night."
The date went well and I want to call her back, but I've heard varying advice on when to call: 48 hours, the following Saturday (today), and just when I get back from my trip (JNAU's suggestion). If I'm thinking this hard about when to call a girl after a date, then I probably shouldn't be dating. On the other hand, if she goes out with me after hanging out with my crew at Skyland, maybe she's a keeper.
Maybe I need to have a drink and not worry so much about shit at home. Shout out to: Stefanie, Marty, Carly, the cul-de-sac, G'Mo (call me, you fuck... I'll fly in early if I need to), Nikki, Robin, Eric, and Erik.
GOOCH: in Reno911
