Going to the White Trash Pageant tonight at the Ash Street Theater. Jesus Presley is hosting the show. The most exciting event of the evening will not be the show, but watching the Jam Magazine banner that I put up to see not if, but when it falls. You can see the nervous anticipation on my face tonight at the show. I really had nothing to say tonight on this log, I was just showing someone how this blogger works. The website is ready and will be up Monday night.

I just received my goochonline.com "XANAX" T-Shirt from the online store. I'm the first on my block, now be the first on yours! High quality construction Hanes Beefy T.

gooch

Ahhh. Slow day at work. What could make my day even better than a beer and fish and chips for luch?

Off! To the Cheerful Tortoise I go. I sit outsite in the perfect 73 degree weather with nothing obstructing my access to today's (absofuckinglutely awful) Oregonian, my food, and my Coors Light. Perfect day. Oh, wait! There's an old couple backing their van and bike trailer into my car. Sweet! SLAM!

"Oh, I didn't see it!" the lady exclaims.

God damn it. During the course of the information exchange, she asks me if they are, in fact, in Portland, Oregon. Great-- Colorado tourists with no sense of direction and an expired insurance card backed into me.

Her pussy husband waited in the car.

So, I got back to my booth. All I wanted to do is eat a decent meal--uninterrupted. Can't have that! Nope, I'm better off staying in the climate controlled confines of my magnificient office.

The outside world sucks.

gooch

The lack of reference to GOOCH or GOOCHONLINE is because I'm testing the page as it appears on my new site. I've also paid to have the banner above this page removed. I'm looking at T minus 3 days.

Last night I began the lengthy conversion of my tedious "columns" page from the old site into individual pages to be navigated with a menu. A lot of my pages are hosted by third-party companies: Merchandise Store, Auctions, these logs, and The GuestBook. This not only saves my limited server space, but also shows my lack of knowledge as a web page designer. Everyone should buy something from the goochonline.com merchandise store. Check it out, yo.

gooch out

You smell that? That's my website. That's right... It's almost here. I just have to convert the columns to individual web pages and build the menu page for easier navigation through my archived rantings. The products store is up, my auction page is built, the guestbook will return in all its glory. I'm on the phone with Qwest DSL right now trying to get any FTP information I can. I've been on hold with the worst possible muzak in the history of the world. Christ... it's like AM's Golden Hits or some shit set to violin, piano and guitar... "Your call is important to us..." BULLSHIT. They don't care. I'll update later. Gooch

The website will be developed mostly tonight. I'm starting a merchandise store at Cafe Press. I've designed a T-shirt, a hat, and a "Gilligan" hat. The logos are pretty top notch. Designed by me, this logo apparel is both self promoting and cool! Don't be the last on your block to own a goochonline.com "Xanax" T-shirt, modeled after one of my own bottles. Or How about the Gooch-Corona logo that all the kids are talking about? Check it out!

Gooch