The Jones Soda Co. Holiday Pack - Only Available from Jones!

YMike sent this to me suggesting I "just add [a fifth of vodka] and 'Presto!' instant holiday liquid meal!"

I might do that the day before Thanksgiving or something. Before I checked my email I went to the liquor store and bought... a fifth of vodka. I'm stocked. The way I stress out around the holidays, how I absolutely fucking hate the holidays... this might not be a bad course of action.

Oh, I really came off sounding like a pussy with last night's blog. I was tired, incoherent, out of my mind. I really was unable to interact with people on any level. I took a picture of my eyes because I was so tired that I wanted to see what they looked like. I did have a shitty weekend and I guess was so conscious of my tired, burning eyes that I thought I should capture the moment. I do like the new U2 album, but it occurred to me today during coffee that the story of the new U2 album master being "stolen" and suddenly released on filesharing networks two weeks before the release date of the actual album and U2 selling out all over Apple's iPod is all one manufactured marketing sceme. Hey Bono... sell your goofball conspiracy theories to the tourists. The bullshit-o-meter here in the GoochCave went off the second I downloaded your first illegally acquired track. What's up now? Hey, The Edge: Webster's called, they want their noun back.

Achtung, Baby... indeed! Gooch the fuck out.

New U2 Album Hits The Net

I'm writing this as I unwind from a blur of a weekend. Party, work, tragedy, romance, revelations, haircut... a microcosmic lifetime was lived by me over the last four days. The mellow, pleasantly simplistic subject matter of the latest pirated U2 album - currently a track titled "Sometimes You Can't Make it on Your Own" is playing gently through the speakers on my computer. I'm tired and anxious... hurrying up to wait for nothing to happen.

I like this new U2 album. I wish I was listening to it on a crisp night on the beach with a bottle of domestic beer in one hand and a cute girl's hand in the other. We'd be wrapped in a blanket in front of a small fire with five or six friends. That would be so perfect.

Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005)

eBay item 5135174066 (Ends Nov-09-04 09:08:35 PST) - 1919 Original Babe Ruth Sale Contract

The good thing about drinking WAY too fucking much in an evening is that you wake up the next morning still drunk. This helps when your buddy tells you the next morning about your antics the evening prior. I ran into friends that I never, ever see in Troutdale. Normally when friends you rarely see all show up at the same place it's either a surprise party or (likely to be my case) an intervention. I drank way too much... delusions of grandeur to a magnitude unlike anything seen from a straight man... I scored a date with a girl that I really like and was turned down by a girl that I really had no interest in. Excuse me... a girl in whom I had no interest. With whom? I certainly had interest in whom. Fuck it. I'm still drunk. I had another girl that I really liked tell me that I'm much more fun when I'm drunk. I had another person tell me that the night before. Way to reinforce a bad habit. Sober Gooch is nowhere near the social status that drunk Gooch has accomplished in the Metropolis of Gresham/Troutdale/East County. I'd accidentally typoed and corrected Easy County, but that's probably more appropriate than the nom de real. Instead of waking up next to an ugly chick, I again woke up next to a bunch of Jack in the Box taco wrappers. I can't tell which is worse. I've started walking/jogging for an hour every other day and then I drink four hours worth of exercise away. I think Tarzan said it best when he said "Um-gawa." I think we're going to barbecue today. Sweet. Went to the Maxim party and brought sand to the beach in the form of three hot chicks. They got in an argument and before you knew it our whirlwind evening ended with me and my friend on his couch watching Insomniac with Dave Attel wondering "what the fuck just happened." At the Maxim Party I did run into a girl that went psycho on me a few nights earlier. She sat there looking sorta hot but with that same psycho look on her face saying "are you mad at me... you probably don't want to see me again..." I do, but only in that dress. If I had a rabbit, she'd probably boil it. I'm going to throw up now... I'm ending every sentence with ellipses... Can you imagine the old days when people had to blog on typewriters? I still can't feel my face. I'm going to lie back down. GOOCH:stupid.

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