CLASSIC MOMENTS IN TIME: ME AND MY SHOP COMPUTER.

Not that I'm complaining... it's not like I work eight-hour days. It's just that I don't think I've had a full day off in the last month. It's cool, though, because work = money = unhindered bender. I'm not drinking tonight. I think I'm gonna watch the news as I fall into a Xanax induced coma. Got an agenda tomorrow. An itinerary. Tanning, workout, and a haircut.

I'M ABOUT TO GET SODOMIZED BY TWO HILLIBILLIES IN THE BASEMENT OF A PAWN SHOP. I DO HAVE GOOD NEWS THOUGH... I JUST SAVED A TON OF MONEY ON CAR INSURANCE BY SWITCHING TO GEICO.

Don't read anything into my "lost condom" scenario illustrated in the last blog... I just sometimes think of things in screenwriter form and thought it would be a funny thing to play out as a scene in a movie. I remember a story of a friend of mine growing up. He was so paranoid of getting an STD yet he found himself screwing one of the nastiest chicks in the neighborhood. The condom broke during the act and he absolutely freaked out. By the time the story got to me he had started rubbing comet on his dick in an effort to clean the herpes or whatever away. In my head... all this would play out with humor on screen, to you it might me a bland anecdote.

JERRY SEINFELD'S BIT PART IN PULP FICTION.

It broke my heart to update this site from anywhere than my flagship workstation here in the [Insert Company Name Here], Inc. compound. I finally fixed my own computer. Now I can go fix others'. Meanwhile, I spent my weekend working at the pub checking IDs. Saw some cool costumes. So... do the costume stores not stock regular maid, regular nurse, regular angel costumes? Everything's naughty, slutty, whatever.

Is there any worse of a feeling than putting a condom on, screwing a girl, um... finishing, pulling out, reaching down to remove the condom only to discover that it's not there?

Maxim party this week. I'm going. Where's my camera? Go to the "PICS" section in the menu above to check out last year's fun.

Wow... I've not really done a lot of updates, yet I've nothing to say. I'll try to seek out adventure this week and write about it.