Happy Valentine's Day, Suckers

Drunken Audio Post:

Wow, I listened to this for the first time this morning, despite the fact that recorded it only six hours ago. It's a very lucid and good sound quality recording, especially for coming from a very drunk person on his cell phone in bed at 1 in the morning.

I almost deleted it, sound unheard, except I like about 90% of it.

goochout.

Is this where we draw the line?

"Rapelay" banned for sale by Amazon

I agree that a game with the objective of raping women and forcing them to have an abortion (it's true... read the story) has really no purpose in society. With that said, the atrocities I've committed during the course of a three hour bender in any Grand Theft Auto would probably make someone question the validity of that game as well.

I'm off to drink and drive.

goochout.

Morning Wood

Shawna Lenee on Howard Stern yesterday

Wow, a live Morning Wood! Not prewritten the night before... I'm actually out of bed and writing this at 7:18am.

I'm so happy that I got my Sirius dialed in just in time for the company to go bankrupt. I don't think the service will be out of existence, but I don't like so much shit happening with a company directly tied to the functionality of about $500 worth of electronics I have in my house, car, and office.

That said, if someone tries to put the Sirius antenna inside your car (on the dash, for example) instead of on the exterior somewhere, grab the installer and hit him in his bitch face. If, after that, he tries to place the anntena within the interior of your vehicle, hit him again. Repeat this until they get clever enough (or heed your recommendation to "put it on the fucking hood for all I care," as my installer did for me) to figure something out, and you'll be golden.

I've created a "smart playlist" of 25 random Beastie Boy tracks. They're back in my rotation. Good theme music for the Taco Bell drive through at 3am.



I'm going back to bed. Peace.

goochout

Gooch: 2010

I think if you give me another year, I could achieve this look.

Artie Lange, 2009: Living fast, dying middle aged, and leaving a bloated corpse.

Great dialogue...

From "Taken," starring Liam Neeson, which I pirated recently:

I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you.

How fucking dope is that right there? On a badass scale of 1 to 12, that shit is a 14.


goochout

Morning Wood...

Can't get enough of these inspirational poster spoofs.

goochout

Whatever Happened To...

"George... what's that pushing into my back?

Andrew Ridgeley?

A.R. 2007

Jitterbug... indeed.

I have no idea what that means.

Click HERE for a link to a 2007 story.

wake me up before you goochout.

Gooch:Out

Money Can't Buy Class, Can Buy Rims II

[Updated]

Saw this gem on the road today. The picture is blurry because I took it while driving, but the lettering on the side says "King of the Road."

Notice the stick-on grill action on the front quarter panel.

This kind of reminds me of those Stomper 4X4 toys from the 80s:

goochout

I wish I could argue, but...

Websense is a corporate web/internet filter used by businesses. Apparently, by default, my website has been indexed and filtered as, well, "Tasteless."

goochout.

Thanks Gregster

Follow the yellow brick road... to self destruction...

gooch, circa 2009. drunk on a school night. completely unable to drive a car or post a blog. Tonight, he'll do one or the other.
Make that the latter.

...and if that headline seemed too gloomy for you, how about the classic:



Morning Fucking Wood!

Katy Perry. Do you get the feeling that if an ugly chick sank "I Kissed a Girl" that it would end up on the alternative stations, rather than on the celebrity blog posts every ten minutes?

I'm feeling very nautical. Feeling very in need of water travel without the use of a sail. Or a paddle for that matter. It would seem that I am in desperate need to get my sea legs through the use of an internal combustion engine. An outboard engine equipped boat. Perhaps a motor boat? That's what I need. I need to take to the open waters on a motor boat. Motor boating. I need to motor boat, because I'm a MOTORBOATING SONUVABITCH!

goochout