Friday, December 05, 2008

Canned Juice, anyone? - HA!

OJ, the guy from the Isotoner ads, got sentenced to between nine and 33 years today in Las Vegas. I sat in my car, listening to the sentencing today and remembered 13 years ago doing the same thing for his criminal verdict. I was sitting in my 1978 Ford F-100 on a residential street near Portland State. Some people are destined for jail. OJ's acquittal in the nineties was merely a "snooze button" for his incarceration.

Las Vegas Review Journal story

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

Lunch Time

From TMZ:

Hockey Fun Fact: You can punch the hell out of an opposing player on the ice, but when you refer to his girlfriend as your "sloppy seconds" -- that's where the NHL draws the line.

The NHL suspended hockey's most hated player, Sean Avery, for talking trash to the new player dating his ex girlfriend Elisha Cuthbert.

Here's the deal -- Cuthbert's new boyfriend, Dion Phaneuf, plays for the Calgary Flames -- and during a practice session in Calgary today, Avery got the media's attention and said the following:

"I just want to comment on how it's become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds. I don't know what that's about. Enjoy the game tonight."

Avery is out pending a hearing with NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman.


Here it is. I haven't actually heard the audio (long story), but is there anything worse way to fuck with another guy? It almost makes me not want to fuck Elisha Cuthbert:


Almost.
Almost, as in I would tap that under even the most extreme no-tap situations. None of which I can think of at this moment.


Still, "Sloppy Seconds" is a low blow phrase and should only used sparingly. For example, in front of the media in a hockey team's locker room.



Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Ridin' Dirty

Ride along with me as I drive to work this morning. Discussed: Fake cell phone anntenas and real GPS systems:



goochout

Monday, December 01, 2008

Ear Candy...

My Cousin turned me on to this YouTube post. It's David Lee Roth's isolated vocal track for "Running With the Devil." Check it out:

I want to do a reverse-karaoke where I play my Casio SK-1 keyboard and have DLR sing over my awesome instrumental.

This reminded me of something I heard on Howard Stern a while back. It's Linda McCartney's isolated voice while singing in a 1990 concert. This, my friends, is funny:



Thanks to Micah for the post idea.

I'm out.

I'm... Gooch

Sunday, November 30, 2008

Leave? But I'm not Drunk Yet...

Drinking at home... then going out... not the way to go.

Woke up this morning and watched Sopranos. I'm pretty sure that Sopranos is the North Pole to my moral compass. I got out of bed, collected my thoughts, shopped at Wal-Mart, looked at the CD section, picked out some CDs, left them there, went home, and downloaded them from a torrent site, and am listening to them now. My awesome music collection is growing:

From the "News of the Fucked Up" department:

Murder Victim's Son, 11, Denied Death Benefits

An employee of the Dollar Tree was killed while on the job. The insurance carrier refuses to pay death benefits because it was a "hate crime" and not, say, a robbery. [thanks, k.g.]

I'm still intrigued about the Wal-Mart employee who was trampled to death. People, in an effort to get a good deal on a DVD player or some shit, killed a guy who stood between them and a $41.00 George Foreman grill. I would have put a bunch of treadmills at the door so when the crowd came through, they would all unwittingly be running in place. "It's taking forever to get to the tacky housewares shit section" they would yell. I am a clever motherfucker.

Also in the stampede, a pregnant woman was trampled causing a miscarriage. There was also a shooting at a Toys R Us. Check it out.

Killed in the name of low prices. Damn.

I just steal music.

Moral Relativism: 1
RIAA: 0
gooch:out