UPDATES/NEWS/GRATUITOUS CLEAVAGE


Kubrick's prophetic essay: I may need to have my eyes held open (ala Clockwork Orange) in order to watch Eyes Wide Shut but Stanley Kubrick had didn't let anyone pull the wool over his eyes when it came to the possibility of terrorist attacks on US soil.

Mom at Ground Zero for the Red Cross: No word as to what the mysterious white powder in the Red Cross cafeteria was, so it is likely that it was non-dairy coffee creamer or other condiment. It's an emotionally and physically (toxic fumes from the flourescent light bulbs are only the latest environmental hazard) taxing situation at the site of the NY terrorist attacks. Today is the first of a three day vacation for Mom which will likely consist of a haircut, and sleep. Days at the site consist of eleven hour shifts, six days a week. She loves the work but is truly exhausted.

Pornstore Janitor, local punk band, is doing a Red Cross Benefit show on Saturday, Oct. 27th. This is an all ages show featuring PSJ and ten other bands. Show starts at 4PM at The Meow Meow club.

Terror Attacks Linked in Investment Fraud: and in related news, there is new evidence that Osama Bin Laden may have purchased three American flag sticker manufacturing plants days before the 9/11 attack.

www.goochradio.com is now accessible as a stand alone link. You will soon be able to get audio and bypass this shit.

Afraid of Flying?: Well, you fucking should be. Click HERE for ways of coping with your fears. Me? I've always hated flying. In line with Kubrick's essay (see story above), I've really creeped myself out with a column I posted in July of this year which contains the line: They never give any instructions in the unlikely event of the plane smashing into the side of an office building at 400 mph. Click HERE for the full column.

GOOCH:out.

holeeeshit.

The Weakest Link: Newsmakers Edition broadcast tonight, proving that the American people will watch anything and that I will use any excuse to skip a workout.

But is it the Weakest Link or the Missing Link?

Tonya Harding: I would have given her $500 if she had said that she was from Vancouver or Boise, or anywhere but from Portland.

Puck? He was on an MTV show some six or seven years ago. Who hasn't been on MTV and does anyone remember anything that was on MTV six or seven years ago? The current demographic to which MTV caters can't remember what happened in real life six or seven minutes ago.

Anne Robinson? She's an alcoholic who lost custody of her kids and... oh, wait, she's the host.

Leif Garrett? The ultimate irony... he missed the question "how many sides on a 'stop' sign. Among the many things that Leif is famous for, he also crashed his car and paralyzed his passenger.

How about: Weakest Link: Who Gives a Shit? Edition or Weakest Link: Nauseaters Edition.