Paris Hilton gets a DUII? Didn't see that coming. I've mentioned this before, but Paris Hilton's Mother hosts a show called "I Want to be a Hilton." In the show, Kathy Hilton teaches white trash how to be classy. She's an authority on being classy because... she married a rich guy and spawned the biggest slut on the planet? Paris Hilton claims that she has only slept with two men. What... at a time? So, to the Hilton Matriarch... perhaps you should spend less time teaching Okeys how to stick their pinky out when drinking tea and more time keeping Grey Goose and on-camera cock out of your daughter's mouth.
A friend of mine and I made a bet to see who could go the longest without drinking. If I drink first, I have to take her to dinner. If she drinks first, she has to make out with me. A good choice on my part because, well, she'd probably have to be drinking to make out with me anyways.
So I sat at a bar tonight and bought sat with two hot chicks and bought them beers while I drank... soda. Diet Coke tastes really fucking funny without Jack Daniels.
The best thing I ever wrote (I think) to date: Click HERE
goochout.
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