GOOCHONLINE - Since 1999

Hmmm... Gooch: drunk: again. Hey, if anyone needs advice on how to run their lives, shoot me an email. My life is so fucked up that I'd cheerfully email you advice on how to run your life. Go ahead... ask me shit. I've just decided that dating could be worse than a full blown girlfriend. I'm not sure. At times of uncertainty, I sleep on the couch all day and watch whatever fucking marathon they throw at me (today was the Rocky movies on TNT). Because I get so lonely, I'll take any chance I can for social interaction, which usually involves drinking with friends until 3am, which is why I'm writing now. I still think I'll look back on these days in ten years and think that these are truly the best days of my life. I guess. I don't know. I'm drunk off Red Bull and vodka for Chrissakes. I feel like I'm not accomplishing anything with my life. This was cool for the first six months of unemployment, but now I'm starting to get bummed. If I could just find the cure for AIDS or cancer or some shit, I'd feel a lot better about my incessant drinking, partying, and jerking off. until then I'm a piss stain on the urinal of life.

The worst day single is better than the best day with a girlfriend. I'm going to make that into a bumper sticker.